Elopement vs. Traditional Weddings: Which Style Is Right for You?

Planning your wedding can feel like an exhilarating adventure—and, at times, an overwhelming one. One of couples' biggest questions is whether to host a traditional wedding or opt for an elopement. Each choice has a unique appeal, but finding the right fit for your love story requires thoughtful consideration.

Let's explore both options alongside two amazing couples so you can confidently decide which path aligns best with your vision, values, and priorities.

What’s the Difference Between a Traditional Wedding and an Elopement?

Traditional Wedding: A conventional wedding often includes a more extensive guest list, a formal venue, and a meticulously planned itinerary. It's the classic celebration many envision when they think of saying "I do," complete with elegant decor, a grand reception, and plenty of space for family and friends to join the festivities.

On average, across the US, couples in 2024 spent around $33,000 on their weddings. (TIME) The total cost included venue rentals, catering, attire, and photography. Traditional weddings are perfect for those who want to celebrate their union with loved ones and embrace time-honored traditions.

Isaac and Gabrielle chose to host their traditional wedding at the beautiful Cole's Garden in Oklahoma City. From their energetic, casual rehearsal dinner at Chicken-N-Pickle, to festive yard games and video game stations during the cocktail hour, to their creative sword cake-cutting, to their heartfelt, personal vows expressing their commitment and love for each other, they felt every aspect of their wedding was a perfect reflection of their journey and identity as a couple.

Isaac and Gabrielle embrace on a boulder overlooking the reflection pond at the beautiful Cole’s Garden in Oklahoma City. © Merry Ohler Photography, 2024.

Elopement: Elopements are all about intimacy, simplicity, and individuality. Think of exchanging vows on a secluded mountaintop, on a private estate, or in a cozy courthouse ceremony. While elopements used to be synonymous with "running away to get married," today they're more about creating a personal and meaningful experience—just for you two or with a small circle of loved ones.

Brandan and Sarah chose a romantic Johnson County courthouse elopement with only their closest family and friends, followed photos at the Nelson Atkins and culminating with a romantic dinner celebration with loved ones at Rye KC on the Plaza in Kansas City. They each shared how much joy they experienced spending the day with their closest people on such an important day, and relished the freedom of time they found by choosing an intimate elopement instead of a traditional ceremony and reception.

Bride and groom walk beside columns at the Nelson in Kansas CIty. | © Merry Ohler Photography, 2024.

Cost-wise, elopements are far more budget-friendly, often bypassing the more significant costs associated with venues, catering, and extensive guest lists. In 2024, the trend of eloping has grown as couples prioritize unique experiences over traditional expectations. (Source: Herald Sun)

Cost Considerations

Traditional Weddings: Traditional weddings can feel like a financial marathon, for understandable reasons! Let's break it down:

Venue: $6,500 - $25,000 for 100-150 guests.
Catering: Around $10,000-$13,000 for food and drinks.
Photography: Between $4,000-$12,000.
Videography: Varies widely.

Naturally, these amounts vary widely depending on your location, guest count, and preferences. While traditional weddings offer a chance to create unforgettable moments for your guests, the memories you’ll create can come with a hefty price tag. (Source: TIME)

Elopements: Elopements are the minimalist's dream, offering savings of up to $25,000 or more. Typical expenses include:

Travel costs (if choosing a destination).
Photographer or Photographer and Videographer to document your day.
Permits or fees for unique locations.
Attire

Many couples spend significantly less by eloping, allowing more room in their budget for other priorities—like a memorable honeymoon or even future investments.

Guest Experience: Grand Gatherings vs. Intimate Moments

Traditional Weddings: A conventional wedding brings everyone together—from your childhood best friend to your great-aunt. Your wedding atmosphere is filled with laughter, dancing, and countless opportunities for shared memories. Managing a long guest list can come with stress, but if a big wedding is what you’ve always dreamed about, this is the right choice for you. Balancing family dynamics, pleasing everyone's preferences, and coordinating logistics may feel daunting, but if you keep your priorities in focus you’ll manage just fine.

Isaac and Gabrielle exit the ceremony site at Cole’s Garden with joyful smiles. © Merry Ohler Photography, 2024.

Elopements: Eloping simplifies everything because there are so many fewer moving parts. With no obligation to entertain a crowd, you can focus solely on your partner and the intimacy and significance of your vows. While it's a quieter celebration, some couples miss the presence of family and friends, which can lead to tough conversations. However, if your heart is set on a private vow exchange, an elopement is the right choice for you.

Brandan reads Sarah’s letter while their closest family and friends look on outside Johnson County Courthouse. © Merry Ohler Photography, 2024

Planning and Logistics

Traditional Weddings: Planning a traditional wedding requires months of preparation. There are countless moving parts, including finding vendors, choosing a venue, managing RSVPs, and finalizing a timeline. Many couples hire wedding planners to reduce stress, but it's still a big undertaking. It’s important to choose helpers to be with you as you make big decisions, interview vendors, and try cakes/catering. Having people you trust nearby will help you navigate these choices with more ease.

Elopements: Elopements are refreshingly simple. Couples can focus on crafting a profoundly personal experience with fewer people involved and minimal planning required. Elopements often leave room for spontaneity and creativity, whether it's a spontaneous courthouse ceremony or a carefully chosen destination.

Personal Values and Priorities

Traditional Weddings: Ask yourself:

Do you dream of a grand celebration with family and friends?
Are cultural or religious traditions important to you?
Do you love the idea of a packed dance floor and a multi-course meal?

A traditional wedding might perfectly fit your personality and priorities.

Isaac twirls Gabrielle around the dance floor in front of friends and family during their first dance in the ballroom at Cole’s Garden in Oklahoma City. © Merry Ohler Photography, 2024.

Elopements: Consider:

Do you value intimacy and privacy over public ceremonies?
Are you drawn to the idea of focusing solely on your partner?
Do you want a stress-free, flexible day that feels uniquely yours?

If these resonate, an elopement may be calling your name.

Brandan and Sarah enjoy a quiet moment outside the Nelson Atkins in Kansas City before heading to their private dinner with family and close friends at Rye KC on the Plaza. © Merry Ohler Photography, 2024.

Wedding Trends in 2025

The wedding landscape is evolving. According to experts:

Micro-weddings (20-50 guests) and elopements are rising as couples seek meaningful yet affordable options.
Couples are spending more on personal touches and experiences rather than adhering to traditional norms.
The average wedding cost has reached new heights, making alternative celebrations increasingly appealing.

Isaac kisses Gabrielle in front of Cole’s Garden in Oklahoma City at sunset. © Merry Ohler Photography, 2024.

Making Your Decision

Choosing between a traditional wedding and an elopement comes down to what matters most to you as a couple. Here's how to decide:

Reflect on your vision for your wedding day.
Discuss your priorities with your partner.
Consider your budget, timeline, and guest involvement.

Remember: There's no "right" or "wrong" choice—only the one that feels true to your love story.

Brandan and Sarah walk to their transportation after their intimate courthouse ceremony in Johnson County, Kansas. © Merry Ohler Photography, 2024.

The Final Word

Your wedding day is one of the most significant moments in your life, and it should reflect who you are as a couple. Whether you choose the elaborate intricacies of a conventional wedding or the romantic intimacy of an elopement, what truly matters is your commitment to one another.

So, ground yourself, trust your instincts, and plan the day that brings you joy. After all, this is your beginning to forever.